Who are the 5 people closest to you and are you a composite of them?
Updated: Jul 20, 2020
Jack Canfield, author of The Success Principles #successprinciples and a ton of other mindset coaches say that we are a composite of the five people closest to us. When you do a quick assessment of the folks around you, how's your composite going? Strong, positive, fun and prosperous? Hope the answer is YES!
People are in our lives for "a reason, season or a lifetime." We need folks on our team that are faithful, supportive and encouraging without enabling. Friends who have the capacity to truly know and understand us at the core. And we need people who think differently and can challenge us...jokesters who make us laugh and forget our problems. Last but not least, people who can match our inner weirdo.
Sometimes, though, we have toxic people in our circle of five--negative, sarcastic and and even shaming. What then? I try to accept them where they're at and spend less time with them. I'll often say some prayers and ask my Higher Power for the next right action. Occasionally it's a conversation that needs to take place. At other times I have to let go #letgo and accept #acceptance that some relationships are simply for a reason or a season. I get into a pickle when I expect all relationships, good and not as good, to be in my life forever. That's not the way it works.
Canfield says this: “Avoid toxic people until you reach the point in your self-development where you no longer allow people to affect you with their negativity. You need to avoid toxic people at all costs. You’re better off spending time alone than spending time with people who will hold you back with their victim mentality and their mediocre standards. Make a conscious effort to surround yourself with positive, nourishing, and uplifting people—people who believe in you, encourage you to go after your dreams, and applaud your victories. Surround yourself with possibility thinkers, idealists.” It's a blog for another time, but I also take time to consider what I bring to the relationships around me and adjust accordingly.
My team is strong, lean and full of love, encouragement and a good kind of challenge. What about yours?